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Monday, 18 October 2010

Madison, WI -- Jim Ringle wishes morning classes didn't start so early.

"I am going to UW-Madison for the partying, not the early classes," Ringle said while sitting in his dark dorm room.

It is a common cry of college students that like to enjoy the college life a little too much, because morning classes don't allow them enough time to sleep off the previous nights events.

"Most college students I talk to to in my morning classes grumble about having to get up so early. I remember last week when one girl looked like death when she came in and ended up sleeping through Biology 101. It was hilarious because she was just snoring away," Ringle said.

College students around the country have long petitioned for later starting classes that match their sleep schedules, but haven't had any luck.

"The professor are a bunch of nerds that go to bed at eight at night and get up way too early," Kate McNally, a college freshman at UW-Madison, said.

McNally and Ringle's are trying to organize a protest outside of the student union this Friday.

"The rally won't be too early, because we want the largest number of students to be there, so it will be at four in the afternoon. Thursday night is double bubble at every bar on State Street, so we need to give students time to recover," Ringle said.

"This protest is also the time that most faculty and staff leave campus, so they will see that we mean business," McNally added.

Campus officials didn't have any comment on this story.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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