London UK: Scotland Yard is reporting that the two women who forced their way into the editorial offices of The Spoof have been taken into custody along with a third woman, the getaway car driver. The thieves had made off with dossiers of all the spoof writers.
The UK detectives found items of interest in the alley behind The Spoof offices, such as discarded Prime Minister UK David Cameron and US President Barack Obama face masks. Additionally, a large quantity of foam rubber padding and a chunk of red meat from a dress were discovered. The padding explains Mark the Administrator remembering little else about the two females, other than the ladies both had 44DD boobs.
The face masks and the red meat were sent to Scotland Yard's Forensics Laboratory for DNA testing. Subsequently, after the DNA analysis was completed the London police raided the apartment of Lady Gaga, also finding Parris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan at the residence.
The three perpetrators of the robbery confessed that they didn't commit the crime for blackmail purposes, but to slowly release the dossier data to UK reporters, US reporters and the paparazzi. The ladies wanted to show other people what it felt like to be constantly followed and photographed. The UK detectives were not too receptive to this defense of the women's criminal actions, after all the spoof writers hadn't put any body parts conspicuously on display as far as is known!
The pinched dossiers of all the spoof writers were not found anywhere by the London police and the trio of suspects were staying mum on the subject. Following a trial, REHAB, a short jail stay and possibly time off for good behavior the spoof writers dossier data may begin to appear in the UK and US tabloids!