Indianapolis - Dick Cheney, Karl Rove Rush Limbaugh and Sarah Palin are tracking down American Spoof writers from the British internet rag The Spoof.com.
First on their list was Jalopenoman in Texas who claims to be conservative, but is often caught watching the Colbert Report with a "Teddy" bear.
"I knew he was a left winger all along!" said Sarah Palin as she held a torch near the J-man's soiled Teddy. "We know what to do with his kind in Alaska!"
Next onto Indianapolis to hunt down a relatively new thorn in their side named Jean Le Fete. "Let me at him!" growled Cheney, "I'll burn his god damned house down!!!!!!!!!!! (cough!cough!) Damned chest pains!!!Let me have some glycerin tablets!"
"He's not home," said Rove, "You've given yourself another heart attack for nothins dick head."
"Chill Rush, you're getting worse than the Dick head here. Turn you damned hearing aids on so you can understand what I'm saying! Geeze! Don't you idiots know nothing about no witch hunting? Next time I'm bringin G.W along, at least he's good for some laughs you three are ass holes. Palin when I told you to burn the bear back there in Texas, I wasn't talkin about the man holding the bear. Got it?!!!"
The Spoof.com is committed to the safety of all of its writers and we are pleased to report that Jalopenoman was spotted bathing in a nudist sand bar on the Rio Grande late this evening, with only minor burns to his buttocks.