At a press conference today, president Obama said that while the Democrats may suck, the Republicans really suck. In addressing the press Obama said:
"You know, I will admit that we, the Democrats suck, we really do, but before you vote us out of office, just keep in mind that the Republicans really suck. I cannot believe that the American people would want to have a Congress and White House that is run by people who really suck. I believe the people should stick with those members of Congress that just simply suck, and that would be us. When you vote this November, keep in mind that you are not choosing the 'lesser of two evils' but the 'evil of two lessors'".
Upon hearing about Obama's statement, Arizona Republican John McCain disagreed with it and said:
"Who is Obama kidding? They don't suck, they really suck, we are the ones who suck".
When asked what his message says about the American public, Obama responded:
"It is quite obvious that the American public voted into Congress a majority of representatives that suck, which happens to be us, the Democrats. This just proves that the American public basically sucks".
"If I were an American voter, I would ask myself: 'Do I want to be someone who sucks or someone who really sucks?'"
"I'm sure that they will show that they just want to suck".
When word of Obama's statement got to Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton, she, apparently not understanding the meaning behind Obama's message, became very indignant and retorted to our reporters:
"I am disgusted to hear the president group all Democrats into the same category. I for one do not suck. I lick".
This is the spoof reporting.