Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 28 August 2010

image for Jessica Simpson's New Clothes Line To Be Modeled By Non-Skinny "Real Women" Models
Jessica admitted that she had gained two pounds in each one of her hooters.

NEW YORK CITY - Jessica Simpson, who has put on about 19 pounds since Valentine's Day, will be showcasing her new clothing line at New York City's Hotel Millard Fillmore.

Ms. Simpson, stated that yes it is true that she has gained 19 pounds, but she attributed it all to stress and worry. She said that she has finally stopped worrying about what people think about her being overweight and looking like an older Kelly Clarkson.

Simpson also said that she still pines for her ex-boyfriend Dallas quarterback Tony Romo who dumped her on the day before her 29th birthday last year.

The hefty blonde singer did say that Tony was not really good for her since during the off season he really goes for Mexican dishes like tacos, tamales, tortillas, and teriyaki tostadas.

Simpson came up with the idea of having a clothing line for the pleasantly plump when she saw photographs of Carnie Wilson, Kathy Bates, and Kathleen Turner sitting at a Dairy Queen in Santa Monica eating a two tiered chocolate ice cream cake.

Jess is still not over the embarrassment of last year when she was thrown out of Australia due to her lip syncing 100 percent of her music concerts in Brisbane, Sydney, and Melbourne.

SIDENOTE: When Simpson was asked who is going to model her clothing she replied that she will be using very skinny "real women" friends like Calista Flockhart, Keira Knightley, and Taylor Swift.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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