Written by queen mudder
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Tuesday, 3 August 2010

image for No tacky 'hole-in-the-sheet' honeymoon for Chelsea and Marc!
A glimpse into the honeymoon suite...

Martyr's Vineyard, Massachusetts - (Niddah News): Honeymoon celebrations were in full swing today with the happy couple eschewing traditional kosher honeymoon rites about the bridle (sic) path to happiness.

As a nod to her new in-laws' Jewish background Chelsea had been rumored to be making some concessions to bridegroom Marc Mezvinsky, whom she married in a Jewish-Methodist interfaith ceremony on Satireday.

"Yeah, but that didn't include the cliched hole-in-the-sheet wedding night ritual!" best friend Tipper Allbright said today.

"Besides, that's such an old chestnut.

"Guess it was invented by someone who'd seen a Talit Katan on the washing line and just jumped to some very pervy conclusions!"

The linen item is a square piece of cloth with a hole in the middle through which you can put your head through.

It has decorative tassles on all four sides and orthodox Jewish men wear it under their shirts.

Centuries of mythology has ascribed to it special conjugal rituals which have become the stuff of goy legend.

The second leg of the Clinton-Mezvinsky honeymoon will see them consecrate their union on the Mount of Olives in Israel - a traditional fertility site redolent with special supernatural powers.

Monica Lewinsky is 69.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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