Written by Dr. Billingsgate
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Friday, 9 July 2010

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Death Panel Tool

After waiting until Congress had adjourned, President Obama appointed avowed socialist, Dr. Donald Berwick, to oversee Medicare and Medicaid. Dr. Berwick, who advocates the redistribution of wealth to equalize health care, said he admires the British health plan because in that system the plug can be pulled on old people so that the young might thrive.

Following up on this despite denying the formation of a "Death Panel," Obama today announced that renowned part- time psychiatrist and full-time cannibal, Dr. Hannibal Lector, would join the Obama health care team as Death Panel Czar.

In an interview, Dr. Lector said that he felt he was uniquely qualified to head the panel, noting that sometimes the decision to pull the plug on a dying patient was required in order to meet demands for his signature human-skin lampshades.

Predictably, Republicans accused Obama of circumventing the usual vetting process in order to make this appointment and vowed to impeach Barack Obama before he was eaten by Dr. Lector.

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