Scientists are pretty well in agreement that the solar flares coming within a few more months could be at an all-time high.
"It could force people to stay indoors for days at a time" stated Dr. Mahmoud Grace of NASA. "If you go out, you could burn badly or at least speed up the chances of skin cancer by 1000 percent."
President Obama says that he is already into this and could order all visits to schools, work and getting groceries be made at night.
Yet another warning concerning your television reception: Just last night during a smaller solar flare, kids watching cartoons on Nick At Night suddenly saw their cartoon disappear and a segment of Miss Nude USA begin.
"I kept hearing the kids saying things like "Boy, look at that hair. You got hair down there, Sue Alice?", stated mother of three, Ada Doobie. "Look at those two big baby-feeders! Do you have those, Sue Alice?"
"No. What's wrong with me?"
"That's when I ran in and saw naked women parading around the stage and the kids watching closely."
"Turn that to another channel, Henry Roy!"
"Mama, am I a freak?", asked little 4-year-old Sue Alice Doobie.