Written by Bill Licks
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Saturday, 19 June 2010

image for Adam Lambert, Miley Cyrus and Justin Bieber - The new head, face and vagina of well known razor blade brand
Miley Cyrus - She's got her mother's looks and her father's shit facial hair

The razor blade company who promised their product was the best a man could get have recruited three of America's brightest young stars to promote their latest one hundred blade razor.

Adam Lambert, Miley Cyrus and Justin Bieber are set to replace Tiger Woods, Roger Federer and Thierry Henry in a series of new TV adverts debuting later this month.

The three were chosen because they have all recently discovered the joys of shaving various parts of their bodies. Lambert controversially shaved his head to promote his new meaner image - not because he was going bald, Cyrus used a razor to shave an unsightly moustache that appeared above her top lip shortly after she turned seventeen and Bieber has claimed that he has had to start shaving too, although the jury is still out as to what and where he has actually shaved.

The series of adverts will feature the three stars pretending to be the best of friends even though they can't stand the sight of each other in real life.

In one advert Cyrus will receive double penetration as Bieber and Lambert shave either side of her face.

Another advert will see Lambert taking it from behind... as Bieber shaves the back of his head.

And the third in the trio of adverts will be one for animal lovers as Lambert strokes a dog, Cyrus plays with a rabbit and Bieber shaves his pussy.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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