Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 17 June 2010

image for Betty White Says That The New Viagra Pill For Women Flibanserin Does Not Work
Betty White on her way to Walgreens to buy some milk, bread, and Preparation H.

CHARLESTON, South Carolina - Betty White was in town to visit her old high school geography teacher. She was asked if she had heard of the new pharmaceutical viagra pill for women which is supposed to boost sexual desire.

White laughed and replied that she had and that she had in fact taken several of the little lavender pills. She said that her doctor gave her a prescription for a months supply and told her that the pills would provide her with a fireworks effect in her crotch region.

Dr. Horatio Quickrose pointed out that she would experience a sensuous sensation of unbounded happy merriment between her legs that could only be described as a little volcano going off in her groin area.

Betty said that she took one as directed an hour before going out on a date. White said that as she was finishing he dessert she suddenly got a strange sensation down around her secondary loins area.

Betty said that she started coughing and then all of a sudden got the urge to spit. A few minutes later she felt like finding a big screen TV and watching some basketball, which she says she hates.

After her and her date, a gentleman who adamantly insisted that we not mention his name, left the restaurant they went back to her mansion in Sherman Oaks.

As soon as they entered her home White said that her date Alfredo Alfombra, touched and caressed her ass. Betty said that she turned around and hit him with a left hook, sending Alfredo reeling down the hallway before he fell on top of an Oriental throw rug.

White walked over to him, bent down, and got in his face. "Hey dude, what the eff is wrong with you? I thought you said you wanted for us to watch some boxing on TV."

Alfredo looked up and asked, "Ms. White, what da shit is wrong with YOU bitch?"

Betty replied, "I don't know Al. For some reason I just have the urge to scratch my balls, drink beer out of a can, and want to get on the Internet and look at some female snatch."

Alfredo asked her for a beer. As she left the room to get it Alfredo ran out the front door.

Betty White later told her doctor that she did experience some most unusual side effects. After explaining it all in detail to Dr. Quickrose, he deduced that White was suffering from hormonal agitation, depressed depression, vaginal confusion, and anal anxiety.

He said that he asked Ms. White if she had any urge at all to eat wedding cake. She said that strangely she did. He said that is what he was afraid of. He told her that she needed to get the bottle of Flibanserin* Viagra Pills and flush them down the commode as soon as possible.

*Flibanserin is Norwegian for the need, desire, and blatant urge to have one's nookie nudged.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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