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Sunday, 13 June 2010

image for Blonde Bikini Bimbos Flock To Louisiana Beaches After Governor Declares Them "Self-Oiling"
Look at the glow of their glistening skin!

In an attempt to recapture some of the dwindling tourist trade, the Governor of the state of Louisiana has begun a new ad campaign. Instead of saying the the state's beaches are polluted due to the BP oil crisis, they are advertised as being "self-oiling" for those seeking a sun tan.

Barbie Winters of Chicago quickly took her vacation and flew down to the Gulf Coast to enjoy the rays and work on her tan. She expressed the feelings of many on the beach when she said: "I go so tired of these macho jocks volunteering to rub suntan oil on me, and then getting upset when I slap them for trying to cop a feel. The timid nerdy types who cream their jeans while rubbing on sun block are also pretty lame. Even worse are the women who pretend to be frustrated by the guys, and then end up being bull dyke lesbos. With the new, self-oiling beaches in this state, I can do it all by myself with a simple dip in the water or roll on the sand!"

The State Department of Tourism has determined that 83% of the people taking them up on the self-oiling option are blonde haired. The other 17% are from Arkansas.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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