BOURBON BAYOU, Louisiana - Well it appears that now we have a second oil spill spewing forth in the Gulf of Mexico waters off the coast of Louisiana.
Joining the BP's Deepwater Horizon well is Diamond Offshore drilling rig Ocean Saratoga. This oil spill was first discovered by a passenger on board a Southwest jet that was bound from Galveston, Texas to Upper Halliford, England.
Byron "Bye Bye" Bankercave, 24, an unemployed unemployment office clerk, said that he was looking out his window seat down at the Gulf of Mexico when all of a sudden he saw a very shiny slick in the Gulf waters.
Bankercave said that at first he just thought that it was the sun reflecting off the warm water but when he noticed that there were no fish, shrimp, oysters, porpoises, or great white sharks anywhere near the shiny slick he realized that it was certainly something spilling out of something.
He called his mom Janjenetta Mae, who called her uncle Biffio, who called Larry King, who called the Mayor of New Orleans Tyrone "Bling-Bling" Du Maupassant-Etouffee.
The mayor then called the Gulf of Mexico oil spill hot line, and after being on hold for 35 minutes was able to get through and file his report.
Authorities form The Louisiana State Department of Off-Shore Occurrences immediately sent two air boats to check out the situation.
Lydell Dirtscrew, who is the assistant director of logistics and stylistics for LSDOO took 16 samples of the oil slick.
After returning to his office in New Orleans he was able to make a positive assertion.
Mr. Dirtscrew was asked what the findings showed. He said that it was a bad news, good news type of scenario. He said that the bad news is that it is in fact oil. He then stated that the good news is that it is not crude oil, but vegetable oil.
He pointed out that it is of the mono-unsaturated and polyunsaturated fatty acids variety.
When asked if it will harm Gulf of Mexico's fish life or plant life he said that it probably won't but anyone eating Gulf of Mexico tuna, shrimp, oysters, or sardines will be getting about 30 times the normal established daily requirements of mono-unsaturated and polyunsaturated fatty acids.
In other news. Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi has stated that the photos circulating throughout the Internet that purportedly show her knockers are in actuality not hers but Betty White's.