After 40 years of marriage, Al and Tipper Gore are taking a little time apart to enjoy more personal space and rediscover themselves. Speculation runs wild as to what precipitated the separation.
"He just didn't measure up to expectations," stated one source, referring to the 2000 president-elect's loss of the seat to Supreme Court appointee George W. Bush.
Another source says Al's passion for the Earth left Tipper out in the cold. "He was always 'away on business,'" the source claimed. "The globe might be warming, but the sheets were like ice."
Nonsense, declares a person who claims to be a "close confidante" of Tipper's. The real reason for the split: "Al always squeezed the toothpaste tube in the middle. After 40 years of mangling, Tipper's looking forward to waking up to properly squeezed tubes."
When asked for the truth, both Gores said it would be inconvenient.