Washington, DC - First Lady Michelle Obama put both feet in her mouth this evening at the State Dinner for the Mexican president. President Juan Julio Diego Maria Calderon was so irate, he left the White House after only a few minutes. Michelle Obama insulted him so deeply, that he cut off all diplomatic ties with the United States.
Michelle Obama wanted things to go smoothly at the dinner. She took a crash course in the Spanish language and also learned a few things about Mexico, to make her guests feel welcome. Everything fell apart, right from the beginning.
"Hasta luego!" said the First Lady to the Mexican president as he entered the White House. She was unaware she had just said good-bye in Spanish. President Calderon frowned at her, so she tried another greeting.
"Bienvenidos a mi caca!" said the clueless First Lady, blissfully unaware that she had just said "Welcome to my shit." An aide quickly whispered something to Michelle, and she gave up trying to speak Spanish after that.
The First Lady then decided to change the subject.
"I understand the Lady of Guadalupe is the Madonna of Mexico. Has she ever posed nude??" she asked with a straight face. She was also completely unaware that Mexicans believe the Lady of Guadalupe is the Virgin Mary.
President Calderon's face turned red with anger, and he began to think of leaving as soon as possible. When he didn't respond to her ignorant statement, Michelle tried something else.
"We just love how Mexicans are so good at lawn care!" she smiled at the Mexican president. "Maybe you can give the White House gardeners some tips about cutting the grass, as long as you're here!" she smiled some more.
President Calderon's face turned purple with rage, and he cursed in Spanish for two minutes, spat on the floor, and then walked out the White House door, never to return.
"Oh! What is something I said??" said the First Lady. "Now, what I supposed to do with all those tacos we ordered??" said the clueless moron.