Written by Charpa93
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Friday, 7 May 2010

image for California First Lady, Maria Shriver Totally Disregards Schwarzenegger's Arizona Boycott
I Pledge Allegiance to Cawlifohnia

Sedona, AZ - California First Lady, Maria Shriver, was seen getting off a private jet in Sedona, Arizona this past week, supposedly heading to her favorite spa for some R&R time away from Arnold. At first, she denied she was Maria Shriver in an effort to stave off questions about why she would totally disregard her husband's call for a boycott of Arizona. However, a day later, Shriver came out of her suite looking refreshed and ready to face the reporters.

Initial questions zoned in on why Shriver would so blatantly go against a call by her husband to boycott Arizona, when she knew it was an issue close to his heart. She answered "Because it's a lame brain idea, that's why. What the heck does he think he's gonna accomplish by asking people to boycott Arizona? If you think that Jan Brewer is gonna back down on a threat from Arnie, you're mistaken. I've met Jan and she's as tough as nails. Why should I deny myself time at my favorite spa just because people are fighting for some rights or something?"

The reporter then asked, "But your husband made a public plea to the people of California. By going to Arizona against his wishes, aren't you setting a poor example? Shouldn't you stand in solidarity with your husband? Said Shriver, "No. Arnold gets a wild hair up his butt on a regular basis and expects me to go along with it. I often don't. Instead, I just smile at him condescendingly, say 'yes, dear, that's a marvelous idea,' and go back to whatever it was I was doing before he interrupted. Honestly, half the time I can't understand a word he's saying anyway, so I just agree to get him to shut up."

Finally, Shriver was asked if her appearing in public in Sedona is going to make her husband appear ineffective as Governor of California, and she replied, "Oh, heck no, that ship has already sailed. If I thought for a minute that my actions could make or break the man, sure, I'd give it some thought, but me make him look bad? He doesn't need anyone to make him look like Governor Goofus, he does a great job of doing that all by himself. Now if you'll excuse me, there's a mud bath waiting with my name on it."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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