Written by Tawdry Soup
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Thursday, 1 April 2010

image for John McCain Delivers the Goods to Sarah Palin in Tawdry Tea-Bagging Incident

In a scene that would make John Waters blush, John McCain lost control of his nether regions while performing a tawdry table-top tap-dance that culminated in a tacky tea-bagging incident involving Sarah Palin.

According to an unidentified eye witness: "After the big McCain/Palin love fest in Arizona last week, the Republicans had a big get-together to get the tea partiers under their tent.

McCain and Palin were sitting at opposite ends of the table and McCain was downing Scotch and leering at Palin the entire evening.

Suddenly, John McCain, wearing only a pair of socks and boxer shorts, began dancing across the table in some kind of drunken "Shuffle-off-to-Buffalo" style and doing that "raise the roof" hand motion thing with his half-arms. Then, much to the dismay and horror of his wealthy donors, he pulled off his underwear and began to approach Palin, who was absolutely giddy from all the attention.

When the tea party crowd began to yell, "Tea Bag, Tea Bag," Sarah got caught up in the moment and turned around and put her head on the table face-up.

About that time McCain went to squat down and dangle his testicles over her nose-or Teabag, as it's called in male strip clubs-and inadvertently blew about 7 quarts of mud directly into her face.

Immediately following the incident, McCain turned whiter than a ghost as his aides helped him off the table. When last seen he was tottering to the bathroom with his wife Cindy following him as she gathered up a trail of cast-off clothes.

The unflappable Sarah Palin, pulling out her compact and a tissue to get a look at the damage that only doo-doo can do, looked up at her unwavering admirers and joked, "Look everybody-I'm Michelle Obama!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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