Written by Frankie The J
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Monday, 29 March 2010

image for Obama Makes NASCAR Illegal by Stroking Off an Executive Order
President Obama on phone to Jane Fonda after making NASCAR racing an "illegal assembly."

DAYTONA BITCH, FL (ABSNN) -- President Barack Obama has declared NASCAR racing to be an "illegal assembly of frigging rednecks," as well a a "huge waste of fucking time and gasoline, and rubber," with one stroke of his mighty penIs he serious?

"I have no chance of getting more than two votes outta these redneck assholes. So, they're finished. No more round and round and round," said an obviously overwrought Obama.

"This is incredible brave of President Obama," said Hollywood somebody Jane Fonda, who hasn't been listened to since 1969.

"Yeah, screw them rednecks," said Sean Penn who nobody listens to at all.

Redneck spokesperson, Jeff Foxworthy, told reporters, "If you have a bead on Barack Obama, you're probably a redneck. Fuck him!"

NASACAR great, Jeff Gordon, said he'd "keep racing as long as people paid him."

"What kind of man has a name like fucking Barack, anyway," said Gordon who many women want to fuck.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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