Written by Charpa93
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Monday, 29 March 2010

image for Chinese Refer to Americans as Their "Dollar Store Bitches"

In a newly released book by Chinese-American Author, Pe Yuan Yu-Smith, titled "You Buy More Yankee, OK?" Americans are finally being made privy to some of the lesser known facts about the tenuous economic relationship between China and the United States.

Although his title is considered a lighthearted attempt to poke fun at some of the things the Chinese have been known to think and say about American consumers, in fact, the book discusses a darker side of how China, over the past several decades, has become the leader in supplying America with some of the most dangerous and useless products in our lifetime. And how they plan to continue doing so until 100% of every item in the American home bears the mark "Made in China."

Getting much of his information in the back storerooms of some of China's biggest export corporations, Yu-Smith gives us a never-before-allowed look into how Chinese manufacturers and exporters plan to eventually bring America to its Imperialistic knees through what they call, "market-cide." Wei Hung Lo, a young Chinese man set to take the reins of the family export business, and who has a good command of the American hip-hop language, put it like this, "Americans are our Dollar Store Bitches, Y'all." One would almost have to agree with him judging from the great holiday season dollar stores around the country had while other leading department stores suffered.

Long's father Wei Tu Lo, has a less crude, but nonetheless equally sardonic view toward his American customers. In traditional Chinese, he explains to Yu-Smith, "We take stupid American's dollar because American too stupid to know quality. We have Chinese cabinets in our family for thousands of years and do not buy new. Americans buy new cabinet if get scratch or leg fall off, so we make cheap cabinet to break easy. American buy more cabinet and we get more money."
A chapter in Yu-Smith's book gives us some insight into the young entrepreneurial spirit of Hung Lo, who just recently opened up a chain of low-priced, low quality hip-hop clothing stores up and down the East Coast called "Gangster Sh'up" offering throw-away clothing for a cheap price. Said Hung Lo, "we bring the sweat shop to every Gangsta Sh'up with our exclusive polyester sweat suits in every design, from Chinese wealth and greed symbols, to big-ass $$ signs in gold."

Agreeing with his father, he states, "Everything we do relates back to money. We have found Americans to be very wasteful when it comes to buying goods and we are just one of many hundreds of companies in China taking advantage of their greed and ignorance."

Yu-Smith takes an especially close look at the controversy surrounding countless cases of children's play things from China found to be made with toxic substances, but still stocking the shelves of various discount dollar stores throughout America. Yu-Smith was unable to get any Chinese manufacturers to open up and tell whether or not they know the products are potentially harmful. However, he was able to ascertain that a consortium of Chinese manufacturers and importers calling itself the Shanghai Legal Alliance of Manufacturers or SLAM, has been formed to pool substantial amounts of money in an effort to offset the eventual tide of international lawsuits that these Chinese companies believe are inevitable.

In summation, Yu-Smith states, "China realized a long time ago that their strengths lie not in superior technological knowledge, but in the ability to produce mounds of cheap plastic crap that Americans seem to crave, as well as copy-cat products with such a high degree of authenticity that most gullible Americans are willing to spend money on knock-offs in the off chance that they can actually fool their friends into thinking that they are sporting a real Rolex or clutching the latest Micheal Kors creation."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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