Written by Cuff
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Topics: Barack Obama

Sunday, 21 March 2010

image for Obama's Birth Certification Authenticated; Finally
Whar da white women

In a stunning deathbed confession or perhaps a feeble attempt at recalling greatness, former funny person Gene Wilder dropped a birth certificate bombshell by revealing the true identity of President Barrack Obama's father; Cleavon Little.

Unfortunately the key player in Mel Brooks brilliant satire 'Blazing Saddles' has been dead for some time but were he still alive we could expect a sardonic grin and the words 'where the white women'.

We would also expect him to know what sardonic means.

In more incredible and related news is the fact that Wilder claimed the President's mother is actually Madeline Kahn! As always this intrepid reporter dug up the dirt (over Kahn's and Little's dead bodies) and with the assistance of Jack Bauer was able to get a cigarette butt DNA sample from the president to confirm.

In the immortal words of Madeline; it's twue it's twue. Even more stunning than the revelation was the apparent duck and dodge Obama has performed with any questions about his authenticity as an American citizen.

"Oh that's the actor's union fault." Wilder explained. "Hollywood has had a don't ask don't tell policy in place long before the military did and since my career died and my body hasn't caught up to that fact what's the point in hiding; besides it worked it's not like he can be unelected. The truth is that both Cleavon and I were blazing Maddie's saddle on set, if ya know what I mean, and when she wound up pregnant we didn't wait around to see what color it was. I heard she sold it to some Hawaiian black baby market. Or is that baby black market? Anyways, who would have thought that those two could have spawned a future president. When all this election stuff came out and with the controversy over the birth certificate I called the actors guild and they said don't sweat it. Cleavon was black balled by Hollywood for selling out African Americans by doing Blazing Saddles so the Democrats didn't want to risk the bad press. I mean think about it. What is worse having the father of our leader the icon for racist satire depicting African males as intelligent, articulate, and hung or some mysterious Congo prince with ten wives kneeling to the east praying to Allah five times a day."

When questioned about his origins Mr. Obama looked in a mirror and smiled, with a sardonic grin of course, and simply said 'Ooh baby you are soo talented….and they are so dumb.' Then he reached toward his waist and said 'excuse me while I whip this thing out' and produced the birth certificate that has caused so much national outrage and satire material.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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