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Sunday, 31 October 2004

image for Presidential Election Decided by Fox Reality Special
Bush and his Tribe

Washington, DC- In hopes of more interest in the oncoming election, George W. Bush announced Sunday that both he and John Kerry would be appearing in a surprise live reality special on Fox.

"Both parties have decided that they needed to shed what we refer as the 'old fogey' image to appeal to the younger, more influential population," stated a spokesperson from Fox.

While Bush was all for the special, Kerry kept changing his mind on whether it was a good idea or not.

"This 'special' is a sad look at how low America has sunk," said Kerry, who then went on to agree to the contract presented by Fox, leading to accusations of more flip-flopping by Bush.

"Unlike my opponent, I will always keep the same opinion on reality shows," Bush said. He later confessed to enjoying The Simple Life and The Biggest Loser.

"The people on those shows- they are the people I'm trying to help. For all those on The Biggest Loser, know that I am currently working on a tax cut for those over 300 pounds," Bush said.

Executive Producer Jerry Bruckheimer, who created the special, says it will be titled President Evil.

"We don't exactly know what the title is supposed to mean, but it sounds awesome, don't you think?" said Bruckheimer.

On the special, Bush and Kerry will head opposite "tribes" who will compete for the title of reality president. The show is hosted by none other than the Karate Kid himself, Ralph Macchio.

"I was very thrilled to meet Ralph," Kerry said excitedly when asked. He then proceeded to show me an autographed picture he took with Macchio, autographed by the actor.

Bush and Kerry will undergo challenges such as eating emu intestines, singing Whitney Houston tunes (with special guest judge Simon Cowell), and jumping off the pentagon.

Viewers will then get to vote for the president they feel was best, either by the old-fashioned way of going to the polls or by phone. Text messaging will also be used: for Bush, text message 1843; for Kerry, 5894.

President Evil will premiere 8:00 PM on Fox, Eastern Time.

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