Written by Rebut
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Topics: Crime, Michael Moore

Wednesday, 13 October 2004

image for CSI - Michael Moore Declared A Crime Scene
"...and that chin, how about that CHIN!!!"

Michael Moore the renowned film director, polemicist (bullsh*t artist) and political analysis (they're studying him) has gone on the campaign trail, in support of Senator John Kerry. Kerry of course, is the Democratic nominee for president and American Top Chin Society spokesman....first man ever to manage 12 chin-ups....

Moore today spoke to an audience of 10 000 at Del Mar Fairgrounds, after his engagement to speak at Cal State San Marcos was cancelled. He told them that America would not thrive if it's universities became places of fear instead of places of courage.

Moore is of course a huge critic on the Iraq war and exudes courage in his New York palatial apartment many many thousands of miles from the scene of the war. He has confirmed that he would be in Iraq like a shot if only it didn't get so hot.

He then invited the audience to chew the fat and was almost killed by cannibals who later apologised for their mistake. They expressed the wish that Moore would film in their country. One said : "I believe Moore would love Kenya where he could be shot on location".

Local members of CSI attended Moore and were shocked to discover that he constitutes a crime scene all by his lonesome. CSI spokesman John Lew explained :

"Moore's weight can only have been gained by eating the equivalent of the national food requirements of 4 medium sized countries. If that's not bad enough he tries to rid his body of waste, not in the normal way, but rather by speaking all the crap he does. If you look around his mouth you'll see all the brown which collects there. Michael Moore is a crime scene all by himself".

Moore then told the audience that he hopes that this teaches people to stand up for what they believe in. He forgot to provide examples so to help out eg fighting for the Iraq cause as far away as one can get, or in Senator Chin's case, opposing the war by voting for America going to Iraq etc.

Many observers are saying that it might be time for Americans to have a wider choice. Ralph Nader is not the answer, the need is for more parties. With Senator Chin and Michael Moore The Hipocrytes cannot be far away.

Just think a documentary maker, who when all his inaccuracies are pointed out becomes a polemic maker, joins forces with the Chin who is the only Catholic for abortion, who found himself in Cambodia during Nixon's reign albeit that LBJ was the President.

Courage? Let that combination become the American president and vice-president and the whole planet will be walking knee-high in the stuff.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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