Written by Bureau
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Saturday, 30 January 2010

image for Animal Rights Groups Demand Robotic Ground Hog, Easter Bunny!

An animal rights group is demanding that no more live animals be used in Holiday celebrations. They say it is cruel to make a spectacle of a basically peaceful animal.

But Bill Murray, president of the Inner Circle of the Punxsutawney Groundhog Club, says the ground hog is "being treated better than the average child in Pennsylvania." The groundhog is kept in a climate-controlled environment and is inspected annually by the state Department of Agriculture. Why don't you go bug the Easter Bunny Cadbury people?

Actually, that is what they attempted to do right after Ground Hog Day gets here on February 2nd.

However, there they could meet even more resistance after discovering that the Cadbury Company had been bought by the Kraft Company.

Not finding out who the Big Cheese was there, they returned to torment President Bill Murray once again.

"Didn't this just happen yesterday? I keep reliving the same days at times."

"Why can't you use a robotic ground hog?"

"Believe me", stated Murray, "I can't change anything. Why don't you wait and the six of you can each substitute for the jackasses in the Christmas Nativity Scene next December?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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