Albert Larson was arrested today after lecturing at Nowhere Important University. The charges came after he went too far with three female University students when he engaged them in a conservative conversation.
Larson was arrested around 3:00 p.m. on Monday and when he was being escorted off in cuffs, reporters asked him why he was being arrested and he responded, "I regret making all those contributions to science and humanity."
Albert has received a number of prizes and awards, including the 1999 Wolf Prize for Human Biology which has helped our understanding of human reproduction.
Larson is being detained at the local Jail until he is arraigned in the morning in magistrate court.
There are reports coming out of the jail that Larson was humped by thirty-two drunken vagrants and one of them is believed to have the AIDS virus.
Intellectual colleagues of his have planned a protest where they will gather scientist around the world to bring a halt to the speedy advancements of scientific progress around the world, until scientist can be given more power over their lives.
Edmund Anderson, a friend of Larson, said he was going to propose to his scientific colleagues a plan to create a new country for scientist where they could be free of government and laws. The country would be administered by artificial intelligence dedicated to the preservation and progress of the scientist.
Female androids made of metal and synthetic materials will be created to give birth to superior human life and will become the mating partners of scientist living in this new country.
The location of this new land has not been determined but many are speculating it to the continent of Australia.