Written by Jordan Baugher
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Topics: swine flu, drunk, wine

Saturday, 9 January 2010

image for Wine Flu Infects Millions of Drunks
Scientists have isolated wine flu using the method shown above.

Sacramento, CA - Hospitals and toilets everywhere are seeing a sharp influx of patients presenting with Wine flu-like symptoms, including dark red vomit, bedspins, and complaints about 'eating some bad chicken'.

Wine flu has been known to science for thousands of years, but doctors and scientists have yet to find a cure. With the advent of boxed wine, Wine flu has become even more prevalent, with the infected being found at bars, parties, and even weddings.

Employers have tried to complain to the CDC that employees calling off work with wine flu is causing significant damage to their bottom line, but nobody was in at the CDC. A message on their answering machine stated, 'We are all out of the office, please leave a message, but don't speak too loudly as most of us have headaches.'

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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