Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Topics: Vets, chia pet

Monday, 11 January 2010

image for Woman Arrested At Animal Clinic After Demanding That They Neuter Her Chia Pet
Julia Burpee taking her Chia pet for a walk. (NOTE: The Chia pet is in her purse).

KANKAKEE, Illinois - A Mrs. Julia Burpee, 89, of Kankakee walked into the It's Raining Cats & Dogs Animal Clinic with a Chia pet tucked underneath her arm.

She told the receptionist that she had seen a TV infomercial about getting your pets spayed and neutered. She said that since her Chia pet is a male, she wanted to have it neutered.

The receptionist, Paige Havenrix, told her that they only spay and neuter dogs, cats, hamsters, canaries, and emus. She said that they do not do Chia pets.

Mrs. Burpee told her that she knows for a fact that they used to do Chia pets, because she remembers her next door neighbor talking about it.

Miss Havenrix became somewhat agitated and she told Mrs. Burpee that she had to leave because her animal clinic does not do Chia pet neutering. Mrs. Burpee said okay and asked if they could go ahead and give her Chia pet its rabies shot.

Miss Havenrix said that rabies shots they can do.

"Great" said Mrs. Burpee, "And you do take food stamps right?"

Police soon arrived and arrested Mrs. Burpee. She was told that she would be released on her own recognizance as long as she agreed to wave all rights to her Chia pet. She did, reluctantly.

In other news. The state of Wyoming has just passed a state law that states that fondling a buffalo merely for the sake of fondling it is now illegal and punishable with a fine of $75 for the first offense and $850 for the second.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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