Washington DC-- The Obama family has discovered the perfect breakfast food and they are eager to share their find with anyone who will listen.
The Obamas have replaced their sugary breakfast cereals and donuts in exchange for nutritious and delicious cow pies!
The fresh cow pies are shipped daily from a ranch in Crawford Texas. Michelle Obama is the biggest fan, and she can't stop raving about them!
"I just adore eating these wonderful cow pies every single day!" she exclaimed. "They are full of minerals and all sorts of goodies. They just melt in my mouth, and I love them!" she said, and then she shoved another cow pie in her enormous mouth.
The First Lady went on to say that every cow pie was unique. Some cow pies are filled with bits of clover or even hay. Some are chewy and some are sticky. Mrs. Obama thought it was a wonderful way to meet the family's daily requirement for fiber.
"I pack a few cow pies for the kids to eat at school. I also give a few to Barack. I know he nibbles on them in the Oval Office. I don't know how they get their funny name, though. They don't look like cows." said the moron.
Mrs. Obama wanted to thank the unknown family in Crawford that sends the cow pies.
"Someone named Laura says she works on a ranch and thought we would enjoy the organic cow pies! I just want to give a shout-out to Laura and say 'Thanks!'" said the bovine.
Mrs. Obama then stated she was going to "sit down with a plateful of cow pies at the computer and then google everything I can about them!"