BUTTCHEEKS, AK (ABSNN) -- The AllBullShitNewsNetwork has learned that beloved British Spoof Writer, Skoob1999, The Man With the World's Smallest Penis, will become the offical spokesman for the cybersex hook-up website eCumonme.jiz at the stroke of midnight tonight.
"I'm so proud that eCumonme.jiz has given me this opportunity to represent them in the media," the writer gushed.
"Men with small peni have been overlooked for far too long. I thank Monsignor Francois Dubois, S.J. for his faith in my ability to carry the banner of cybersex to the less fortunate among us," he said.
eCumonme.jiz was on the verge of becoming bankrupt when it was purchased by Msr. Dubois, a Jesuit priest, and the very first RC clergyman to be released from his vows of chastity.
"I think everybody should get laid--even if it's only in cyberspace," said Msr. Dubois.
Skoob1999 is the World's 13th or 14th funniest fucker according to statisticians who keep up with such shit. He promised such new and innovative ideas as the Mutual Masturbation Chat Room, and live podcasts of celebrity peni and vagini with prizes for those who correctly identify them.
"Tonight, and for the next week, all hook-ups on eCumonme.jiz will be free," Skoob promised.
However, ther are some charges for use of the service. There is a $69.69 registration fee which covers the inital 69 question sexonaire. And there is a $0.69 hook-up charge with each log in.
"If you wanna join the fun just log in a and register before midnight tonight. You don't want to miss seeing Msr. Dubois run nekkid through blackberry bushes, now do you," said Skoob.