Written by Bureau
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Tuesday, 29 December 2009

image for President Obama Agrees: Terrorists To Get New Names!
"Go Ahead & Shorten Them!"

One thing all newspeople from print to CNN are agreed upon is that the names of terrorists are getting ridiculous and they have demanded shorter names or nicknames from the CIA and FBI.

Yesterday it was reported on several Tv stations with a different name spin: The latest attempt at terrorism by Nigerian nationalist, Umar Farouk Abdulmutallabhastani, is the straw that broke the camel's back in America's news broadcasting business.

"Why not Aaryan "The Swine Killer" bin Mubarr?" asked one newsman.

"Let's put some fun into this thing!" stated Bill Mudd. "I'm getting tired of these names. My tongue hurts. I say we do the same thing as some of those longass Mafia people and make up our own."

"Farouk, my happy ass, that's Aaryan The Swine Killer" Mubarr. That's hard enough, but it's funny as shit."

After hearing the projected names, President Obama has agreed. "They can call themselves Abuobqaedashishbob but from now on, he's Abu 'The Butcher' Muhaymin."

"How does Al Jazeera do it?" asked one reporter. "And what about their two foot thick telephone directories with ten million Mohammeds?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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