Written by Lord Munodi
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Topics: Security

Monday, 28 December 2009

In response to a recent attempt by a nigerian man to blow up a flight with an explosive hidden in his pants, US Homeland Security has put in place a new procedure which requires all passengers to pass their pants through the scanning machine at airport security checkpoints.

"It makes sense," Homeland Security Chief Janet Napolitano said when asked about the new screening protocol. "When that guy tried to blow up a plane with his shoe, we started requiring people to take their shoes off and pass them through the scanner. This Nigerian guy tried to blow up the plane with a bomb in his pants, so we'll have to check those now too."

Some passengers were caught off guard, including one man who hurriedly tried to pass through the security screening check point without any underwear on at all. He was arrested for public nudity and may be forced to register as a sex offender. "I don't wear underwear," he was heard to say by one bystander. "How was I to know?"

On a brighter note, private jet companies report a record number of inquiries after the new security screening policies went into place.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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