Former President, that is, Vice President Dick Cheney has had a face lift that has his eyebrows in a question mark, just like Nancy Pelosi, the Speaker of the House, but he now also has a constant smile.
"I got tired of all those a**holes saying that I had a frown all the time and looked mean so I had the work done. Now every s*it out there can see what a nice guy I am underneath. This is the real smiley me. Shit, I sound like that ****** Cyrus idiot. Next thing will be a mullet hair piece."
However, Nancy Pelosi, with a look of shock on her face -for the past two years -says that the Dickster hasn't got her fooled.
"He would water board me in a second", she reportedly stated to a House member. "I think I might like that."
Then she shook her head and went off to speak with Harry Reid, head of the Senate, to make sure that the rookie democrats not be fooled by thinking Dick Cheney is a really friendly fellow.
Meanwhile, former President, Jimmy Carter, seems to have had HIS face lowered sometimes around 1998.
"Carter looks like somebody shit in his beans", stated the grinning Cheney. "What's the matter, Peanut Head?"