Sarah Palin has announced after days of excuses and complaints that she would not be treated fairly in a debate with Al Gore has decided that she would, indeed, debate him on climate change.
Said Palin, "I know what their plans are and that is to trick me and ask questions they know I can't answer. Al Gore, with his fancy pants Harvard education and his big words thinks he can make a fool out of me. He is probably talking to Katie Couric right now as I speak. I will debate Gore but I will debate him on my terms. I will speak in tongues.
"His folks may not be able to understand me, but then, my folks will not be able to understand him either. It is a win/win. I know all I need to know about climate change. I mean, who doesn't?
"In the winter, it gets cold. That's why we have furnaces and warm sweaters and radiators in cars and snow sleds and mittens and all that stuff. In the Spring, it gets warmer, that's climate change and God sends us flowers and birds and baby wolves to shoot from an airplane, and all that stuff.
"And then summer comes. That's another climate change. That's why we have loose clothes and bathing suits and air conditioners and showers and all that stuff.
"And then fall comes, another climate change. It starts to get colder and that's when we have football and hot cocoa and pumpkin pie and all that stuff.
"What's so darn complicated about that? No need for some fancy pants to tell us. I am happy to debate: Mr. Know It All."
A reporter caught up with Mr. Gore at a climate change event in New York City and asked him his reaction to Ms. Palin's statement. Al Gore declined to respond but onlookers did say they saw him roll his eyes, look upward and heard him say under his breath "Not again. Why Me Lord?"