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Topics: Turkey, Thanksgiving

Wednesday, 2 December 2009

image for Shopping Couple Leave Kids Alone In Shopping Cart For Two Hours

An Alabama couple have been accused of getting so carried away with grabbing Black Friday deals that authorities said they left their kids alone in a shopping cart.

Bluford County Sheriff Gaines Pepper told ALAB Radio in Broadbeam, Alabama, that a 38-year-old man and his 37-year-old wife were charged with reckless conduct.

However, the couple, Mr. & Mrs. Otto Nobetter, say they tried to get back to the kids repeatedly but were blocked by huge people going the other way.

"The kids were crying for us and we tried to yell that everything was OK but you couldn't hear us over a big fight in the frozen turkey section", stated Mrs. Nobetter.

"I got hit with one of those things! You ever get hit in the head with a frozen turkey? I don't think I'll ever look at the Thanksgiving season the same again. I was so busy after that, trying to stay conscience and not drop to the floor, for my life depended on it."

The couple, in court today, stated that they finally got Otto patched up and quiet his gibbling and gobbling and went after the kids.

"Those kids were smart", stated Attorney for the Nobetters, Bubba Ledbelly. "They knew not to get out of that cart. It wasn't the parents fault they let go the cart during the announced turkey sale. You'd think that the day AFTER Thanksgiving, people would be sick of turkey but I guess they were stocking up for Christmas."

Nevertheless, the Nobetters were charged with leaving the children alone (reckless conduct) but given a suspended sentence and a small fine.

Police say they have arrested 13 other people over the frozen turkey fight and one Ada Toyd for secondhand assault on Mr. Otto Nobetter with a frozen turkey.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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