Deadwhorse, Alaska - (UpstreamGal): Tight security surrounds a Proud-Ho Bay-registered crude tanker, the ExxonNikitaKhrushchev, which has been de-mothballed at a CIA forensic recovery site in Unalaska.
The iconic 1960s carrier is the subject of intense speculation that its hold served as a modern day 'manger' in the Obama nativity story.
The crucial new evidence points at Mary Jo Kopechne's confinement deep in the vessel following a torrid affair with the Reverend Jesse Jackson.
The news has thrown a spanner in US Birthers' works because the precise location of the ExxonNikitaKhrushchev's natal position may eventually be found inside American territorial waters.
"Of course if it was berthed at the USSR's notorious Bloodyvostock nuclear submarine deepwater dock then we're talking another Russian American president of the United States," a Century Plant Foundation stink tank source commented, "just like both Bushes, daftass Clinton, Ronald Reagan and one or two others!"
In 2001 the Condoleezza Rice tanker was renamed by Chevron as The A|ltair Voyager.