In a very kinky case of mixed fruit, teenage stars Hannah Montana and Hannah Dakota have been linked to Spoof Pornographer Colonel Juan, the third world's answer to our own Roman Polanski.
The Colonel, who never met a press conference he didn't get off on, met with TV reality network execs yesterday in London to discuss explicit U-Tube photos purportedly of the the two teenage sex kittens fondling the Colonel's Pocket Rocket while pool side at the Oasis Bar and Grill in Pattya, Thailand during a recent timeout from the girls' hectic schedules.
"Hey," said the Colonel, "I saw them in the pool cavorting in their thongs, and I introduced myself to them. They were well familiar with my work on the Spoof and immediately wanted to know if they could work their way into a few of my more sordid stories."
"They are both very nice young ladies with a big future ahead of them, and Miss Montana personally assured me that it was definitely not HER purportedly shown on June 16, 2009 giving a blow job to her body guard."
"On the other hand, " she said, " I couldn't vouch for my bosom Buddy Hannah Dakota!" as she looked me in the eye and made suggestive sexual sounds with her straw sucking the bottom of her Pina Colata glass."
According to an eye witness for the Spoof, Mr. Gnarly Woods, part time correspondent, the Colonel was showing some distress in the region of his
Olympic Speedo, and both girls gently patted his protuberance as if to assure him that size really didn't matter, thereby assuaging his manhood.
The Colonel was philosophical about the matter..."Hey, one is 16, the other is 15....add them both together and that equals 31....I love a good MILF!"