WASHINGTON DC - White house press secretary Hairy Hiney today announced that the war department, aka defense department, would be renamed as the Honor Killing department in deference to political correctness.
It is felt that this will draw a more diverse and happy collection of soldiers for the various battles that are required to ensure the supply of drugs and oil for Americans.
Everyone is for honor. Who can debate an honorable killing?
As everyone knows, if we ran out of drugs and oil, old people would not be able to drive to the drug store to pick up their drugs, and America would virtually shut down.
So, to procure plenty of poppies and petroleum, people of all persuasions will prosper now in the pentagon.
The President is even thinking of issuing firearms to soldiers on American military bases to provide them with a feeling of security, although the Speaker is bucking this one. As she said, "Guns are bad. Bad people have guns. "