Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 7 November 2009

image for Willie Nelson Wants To Lease Breckenridge, "Marijuana Is Now Legal" Colorado
One of the pair of expensive hippo boots that Willie Nelson was given by President Obama on his 76th birthday.

AUSTIN - Country music singer, songwriter, legend, and icon Willie Nelson has just stated that he wants to lease the Rocky Mountain town of Breckenridge, Colorado.

Nelson who is 76, says he feels 36, and admits that he looks 86, said that ever since his 2006 conviction on marijuana possession he has been very leery of when and where he smokes his special 'nameless' brand cigarettes.

He said that when he first heard about the town of Breckenridge legalizing marijuana he told himself that he just had to go and have a look at this futuristic town.

Nelson immediately rented 10 rooms for two months at the local Holiday Inn for him and his band. But the more he thought about it the more he realized that he had to do whatever he had to do to just flat out rent the entire town.

And so he called up Breckenridge Mayor Naomi Fliggflicker, 42, and asked her how much it would take for him to lease the whole city.

Mayor Fliggflicker was throw back because she said that she had never ever heard of anyone wanting to rent an entire city. She asked Mr. Nelson if he was really serious.

Willie replied that he was 'effen A serious.' He then told Mayor Fliggflicker to just figure out what the dollar amount is and that he would pay her in cash.

Nelson told the mayor that he has a fan base that numbers close to three million and he knows that most of them would visit Breckenridge at least half a dozen times a year.

He informed Mayor Fliggflicker that the town would probably have to build at least a dozen more pizza restaurants because his fans love pizza and can put it away like most people eat peanuts.

The 76-year-old country music icon stated that he would even agree to put on four free concerts a year that would bring in hundreds of thousands of fans and their millions and millions of dollars.

The mayor's eye's got the size of ping pong balls with dollar signs on them. Willie even told the mayor that he had heard that the town's high school was having lots of problems with its heating system.

Nelson told her that he would personally pay to have a brand new state-of-the-art high school built. And he would insist that it be named Mayor Naomi Fliggflicker High School.

An unnamed source close to the mayor said that he literally saw the mayor's high heels come off the ground and he noticed a little wet spot on her shorts crotch region.

The mayor smiled and said that it all sounded like a "win-win" proposition. Willie agreed and he told her that he was getting ready to buy a brand new ultra modern band bus, which he was going to christen The Mayor Naomi Fliggflicker Rocky Mountain High Colorado Bus.

The mayor of what will soon most certainly be the 'highest' city in the entire Rocky Mountain range told Mr. Nelson that she would sit down with the city's treasurer and they would formulate some kind of contingent plan and get back with him with the particulars.

A highly reliable source has stated that 60's icon bands such as Crosby, Stills, Nash, & Young; Three Dog Night, Grand Funk Railroad, Steppenwolf, Iron Butterfly, and Bob Dylan are all looking into the possibility of buying some land as close to Breckenridge as possible.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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