In a stunning announcement today, a spokesman for The T-Bagger and Birther movements stated that they were leaving in mass to emigrate to the moon.
"We have had enough" said the spokesman, "and we're not going to take it any longer. We are going to a place where we can live like real Americans..where there is freedom...no commie gubment...no Negroes...no Mexicans..no Jews...and no faggots...and if there is any faggots (we ain't so sure of cousin Little Eddie, he added) they can have their own crater and a steam bath. If there are any little Martians there..we'll take care of them jes like we took care of the Injuns..unless maybe they built some of them little casinos" he chuckled.
The spokesmam was asked by a newsman how many were going to tne moon. "I'll tell you this,there ain't gonna be many towns left in Kentucky, West Virginia, Alabama, Georgia, Mississippi, or Tennessee...ain't gonna be many tax payers either" he laughed..."no siree...we be pickin up lock stock & barrel....our mommas didn't raise no stupid kids.....when the gubmint took over our medicare and social security we decided...we're out of here...goin to a new life of freedom...no taxes...no books...no more Obama dirty looks"
The crowd of approximately three hundred men, women and children cheered and pumped their fists in the air as a country western band played "Fly Me To the Moon"
As the crowd dispersed the spokesman was asked by a reporter..."How are you going to pay for all this...isn't it going to cost billions...... Where is the money coming from?" "We waitin on the gobmint grant" was the reply. "Damn gobmint owes it to us ...they can take it away from all those welfare cheats they been payin and give it to some real Americans."
A contact in the Obama administration speaking on condition of anonymity has confirmed that the government is moving quickly to supply the billions of dollars to transport tens of thousands to the moon as private citizens on the east and west coasts also planned to donate millions to the effort. Private citizens donations are being coordinated by MSNBC under the guidance of Keith Olbermann.
The Associated Press is reporting that Bill O'Reilly, Glenn Beck, Shaun Hannity, and Rush
Limbaugh have all joined a cloistered monastery in Teaneck, New Jersey.