Written by Thermophyle
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Topics: Marriage, Animals

Sunday, 25 October 2009

image for Louisiana Justice of the Peace Approves of Interspecies Marriages
Mrs. Sadie Bardwell

Louisiana Justice of the Peace stands by his objection to interracial marriages but has no objection to interspecies marriages.

Last week reporters traveled deep into the back woods of Louisiana's, Tangipahoa Parish, 8th Ward, to the mobile home of Keith Bardwell. Mr. Bardwell the Justice of the Peace has been thrown into the national spotlight for being unwilling to marry an interracial couple. Reporters can only describe his home as a place not unlike a scene out of the movie "Deliverance". One reported said he actually heard Dueling Banjos come across the radio during the interview. While interviewed, Mr.Bardwell stood his ground and maintained good composure.

He was just about to end the interview when out from the back bed room walked a three hundred pound Yorkshire pig. With most of the reporting team retreating at that point, Mr. Bardwell calmed them saying there was no cause for alarm, as this was his wife Sadie.

After the reporters in the room regained composure, one of them ask Mr. Bardwell how could be so hippocritical to object to interracial marriages and he himself be married to a hog. At that point Mr. Bardwell lost this calm demeanor. He blasted them saying, "How dare ya'll comin down here passin judgment on our ways. This is the way things been for generations hereabouts. I've married many of my kinfolk and local citizens in these parts to some of our special farm animals. But I only marry the serious ones and never to the dark animals. This ain't the same as interracial, Sadie is a white pig, she's pure bread American Yorkshire White. Ya'll get on out of here now while you're not full of buckshot."

Reporters visited and interviewed several of the 8th Ward's citizens. They all confirmed what Mr. Bardwell has said. It seems interspecies marriages have been done for generations in that part of Louisiana. They just still seem to have a big problem with interracial couples even today.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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