Written by Aspartame Boy
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Saturday, 24 October 2009

image for US pilot denies cockpit booze - says saw 'balloon boy'
Pilot of legion air flight 666

DENVER, CO - The pilot of the now infamous flight to nowhere claims he was not drinking in the cockpit, this time. He claims, according to my source, the stewardess he slept with last night, that he in fact saw balloon boy at 36,000 feet. He is afraid to tell this to the authorities.

He told the stewardess he was just following 'balloon boy' and that the empty bottle of 151 rum was actually used to hold water/aspartame mix that he drank en route.

He says the copilot was asleep, as they normally take turns sleeping on long flights. He said it is how pilots keep looking so young. According to my source, he did not look young, but had a lot of money, since pilots are well paid to sleep in cockpits.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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