Written by Geneva Slim
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Topics: balloon, Pat Riley

Thursday, 22 October 2009

image for Savvy Pat Riley Trademarks Phrase "Balloon Boy"

ORLANDO, FL - Former NBA coach and current Miami Heat president Pat Riley has trademarked the phrase, "Balloon Boy."

Riley, who is famous for having trademarked other phrases, such as "Three-peat," "Oh, no you di-int!," "Up yours!" and "Get off my sister!," made the announcement today at Orlando's Sea World theme park.

"I know it might seem odd that an NBA exec has glommed onto the phrase, 'Balloon Boy,' but knowing me, I'll come up with some brilliant application for it that'll make me even more millions," Riley said. "And in the meantime, I'll be raking it in just from overkill media usage alone!"

Riley made the announcement this morning at the park's porpoise mating enclosure. Park spokesperson Dolly Finn told the assembled reporters that the venue had nothing to do with Riley's rumored erotic fetish involving aquatic mammals. "He just wanted to make his announcement at a happy place," Hooper stated, eyeing the porpoises protectively.

Falcon Heene, the Colorado youngster who last week was said to have gone airborne in the big, duct-taped plastic thingy that resembled a giant bag of Jiffy Pop, could not be reached for comment.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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