Written by Ed E. Druckman
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Friday, 9 October 2009

(New York-NY) Patriotic or Xenophobic, depending on if you are a regular viewer of Fox news, talk show host Rush Limbaugh's head exploded during a broadcast of "The Rush Limbaugh Show". Limbaugh was in the middle of an impassioned speech on President Barack Obama being awarded the Noble Peace Prize.

Among other things, Limbaugh called the action the "politicization of an already politicized Prize" from a "bunch of cheese and chocolate eating Nazi sympathizers". According to eyewitness, producer Sean Jaques, "All of a sudden, his temples started to throb. And his head kind of looked like it was being sucked into a wormhole. Next thing I knew, I was ankle deep in what I thought was red sauce, but it wasn't red sauce. Actually, it was kind of pink, maybe like a penne and vodka sauce."

Prior to the explosion, Limbaugh made several statements about President Obama's acceptance speech. "President Obama accepts this not as a recognition of his own accomplishments, but as an 'affirmation of American leadership'. Allow me to say, Mr. President, that if you accepted it on behalf of your accomplishments, what accomplishments, Sir? And as to an affirmation of 'American leadership', since when are Kenyan born individuals American leaders?"

The latter comment was an allusion to the "birther movement", individuals who claim that Barack Obama's birth certificate is false, that he is not a native citizen and therefore his Presidency is illegitimate. And it was over this issue that the explosion ensued when left leaning talk show host Rachel Maddow called in.

"Rush, do you mean to tell me that you are saying Barack Obama should not receive this award over a rumor that was long ago discredited," said Maddow. Limbaugh replied, "There goes the left putting words in my mouth. What I said was that he shouldn't be President because of a discredited rumor."

Maddow then accused Limbaugh of being a racist and "that's when the brain matter hit the fan or control room glass," said Sean Jaques. "If by being a racist, you mean a white man who wants to make sure that everyone in this country gets a fair shake and not just because they've got a wet back, guilty as charged," Limbaugh blasted.

According the audiotape of the show, Maddow is heard laughing. Limbaugh mumbles something unintelligible about "lesbian Jedi mind tricks" and "I've eaten my share of tacos too." The next sound was Limbaugh's head exploding.

The question of who will now fill Limbaugh's place is an area of great concern. As expressed by former producer Sean Jaques, "My pants and shoes were ruined, and I'd really like to know who to submit the expense voucher too."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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