Written by Jalapenoman
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Topics: Theft

Thursday, 8 October 2009

image for Brooke Astor's Son Anthony Found Guilty of Looting Dying Mother's Estate
Ms. Astor's "petty cash" fund was kept in 37 cookie jars.

Anthony Marshall, 85 year old son of the late heiress and philanthropist Brooke Astor, has been found guilty of looting the estate of his mother for over $200 million dollars. Marshall was convicted by a New York jury on 14 counts of grand larceny and fraud.

When asked for a comment, Marshall said that "hey, everyone takes their parents loose change. I needed gas money for my car and such. You don't expect me not to go biggie size when I take a girl out for a burger, do you?"

Ms. Astor, who died in 2007, was reached by a Medium and asked her opinion of the verdict. She said that "my son's allowance should have been enough, but I'll bet that boy was using the money to keep porno magazines between the box spring and mattress and that he snuck in to R-rated movies."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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