Written by Abel Rodriguez
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Thursday, 1 October 2009

image for Dallas Cowboys Quarterback Tony Romo Buys Ex-Girlfriend Jessica Simpson Another Dog
Jessica Simpson's brand new dog Daisy 2, which was a gift from ex-boyfriend Tony Romo.

DALLAS - Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo has just given his ex-girlfriend Jessica Simpson a brand new dog which looks exactly like her ex-dog Daisy.

Romo said that he felt real bad for Jessica when he heard that little Daisy had been dognapped by a California Chupacabra.

He said that he read on the Internet where Jess had posted a reward for the return of her little canine pet.

Tony, who resides in Texas, is quite well aware of the fact that California Chupacabras, like the Texas Chupacabras do not exactly know how to read.

Tony said that all during their relationship he warned Simpson on many occasions about going out in her backyard and sunbathing in the nude while allowing Daisy to just roam around freely.

He noted that about two weeks before he dumped the blonde singer, little Daisy had gotten into a fight with a squirrel.

Romo remarked that lucky for Daisy and Jessica, he just happened to have his sawed-off shotgun with him and he unloaded both barrels into the little effen squirrel who not only dropped Daisy, but all of his nuts as well.

Tony laughed and said that the expression on the little squirrel's distorted tiny little face was priceless. He said that Daisy quickly ran in the house with her tail tucked so far between her legs that it actually disappeared into her (blank).

The Cowboy quarterback said that Jessica jumped up so fast that she knocked over her tube of cellulite cream, her iPod, and her bottle of Seagram's Seven.

When a reporter heard that Tony had bought his ex-flame a new dog he asked him if it meant that maybe the two may be getting back together.

Tony smiled his patented Tony Romo smile and answered, "No." The reporter asked him if he was going to at least consider it.

Tony raised his eyebrows and replied, "No." He then told the reporter and let me say it in Spanish as well, "No."

SIDENOTE: Jessica's little sister Ashlee said that her big sister wanted to name her brand new dog after ex-boyfriend Tony but she decided that "Jerk" would really not be an appropriate name for her new dog, so she decided on Daisy 2 instead.

Make Abel Rodriguez's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 2 plus 5?

8 1 7 4

Go to top