Written by Dingwall Johnson
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Topics: Penis, Kanye West

Saturday, 19 September 2009

Kanye West has splashed out on on an extension to his new Hollywood crib - in the shape of a penis.

The diminutive R&B rapper, or whatever he is, is back in the news once again for acting like a total knob.

But he was determined he would the last laugh after being right royally ridiculed of late.

He has been the butt of jokes since storming the stage at the MTV VMA awards, at which he grabbed the microphone from a startled little country girl as pure as the driven snow, called Taylor Swift for Chrissakes.

Now Kanye is fighting back the only way he knows how - with his Johnson.

Guests who arrive at his palatial crib are greeted by the new erection before reaching the driveway.

But the diminutive R&B star, or whatever he is, is fuming becuase planners failed to read the plans correctly - erecting the extension in inches instead of metres.

In a reference to rock mockumentary Spinal Tap in which a stage recreation of Stonehenge fails to measure up, Kanye said: "It's like Spinal Tap all over again, only my cock up is bigger... smaller, I mean... brother you know what I mean."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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