Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 17 September 2009

image for Kevin Skinner Wins The Whole (Chicken) Enchilada!
Kevin Skinner's tractor which lately his girlfriend Wanda Sue has been riding for 12 hours everyday.

HOLLYWOOD - Kevin Skinner and Barbara Padilla stood side-by-side on the America's Got Talent stage. And then host Nick Cannon announced the winner of the $1 million first prize...Kevin Skinner!

Skinner started crying, Padilla started crying, and Grandma Lee who came in third started crying and saying that she was gonna wait until Kevin went to the little boys room and she was gonna steal his trophy and his $1 million check.

Cannon asked Skinner what was the first thing he was gonna buy with the $1 million and good old boy Kevin, who sometimes spells his name Kevn without the i, thought for a moment and then told Cannon that he was gonna buy some brand new tires for his double wide trailer.

The good old boy from Mayfield, Kentucky remarked that he was also gonna pay back the $38 he borrowed from his neighbor and fellow chicken catcher Bubba Tigglewood back in March.

Cannon asked Kevin why his girlfriend Wanda Sue had not made it to the America's Got Talent finals show. Kev wiped the tears from his eyes and pointed out Wanda Sue wanted to come but she is afraid of airplanes. Cannon asked why she didn't take the bus.

Skinner then confessed that Wanda Sue is also afraid of buses, as well as trains and boats.

The AGT winner smiled and said that the only means of transportation that Wanda Sue ain't afraid of riding is his pet donkey Mr. Pepito.

Skinner told Cannon that WaSu, his pet name for Wanda Sue, wanted to ride Mr. Pepito all the way from Kentucky to Hollywood but Mr. Pepito hasn't been feeling too good lately ever since a week ago when he got bit by one of the chickens.

Kevin said that Mr. Pepito's left hind leg is still kind of swollen and that he has been having nightmares for the past three days.

Nick asked if Wanda Sue was gonna watch the show live back in their hometown of Mayfield.

Kevin wiped three tears from his eyes, grinned and said that he had talked to WaSu earlier and that she had told him that she wasn't gonna be able to watch the finale because she still had three acres of carrot seeds to plant and she would probably still be out plowin' til way past midnight.

SIDENOTE: Fellow Kentuckian actress Ashley Judd called up Kevin and told him how proud she was of him. She then mentioned that she had named her new pet Doberman Pinscher after him. Judd said that 'Chicken Catcher' is four weeks old.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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