WASHINGTON D.C. - President Obama today announced a new program to follow on the heels of the cash for clunkers program. In a small press conference today, lightly attended, he gave the details and motivation.
"The cash for clunkers program ends Monday, people. So, people, what we need is another stimulus program to follow that $4,500.00 dollars and multiply the effects of that spending. What do most people do when they buy a new car? They go out to eat. That's why I'm offering up to $450.00 for dinner left-overs. To get the full amount, the food must be fresh when it reaches the White House. And, I don't like orange soda, so don't lay that stereotype stuff on me. And no aspartame. That crap is for population control."
The President had to excuse himself. He was clearing out the downtown area around the White House to make room to park all his new clunkers.