Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Topics: George Michael

Sunday, 16 August 2009

image for George Michael Arrested For Hitting A Lorry
A blurry photo of the lorry (truck) that George Michael hit with his Land Rover.

LONDON - George Michael, who has sold over 100 million records world-wide, was arrested in London for crashing into a 'lorry' (truck).

Michael was driving a late model Land Rover when he lost control and hit the lorry. When police arrived on the scene they immediately suspected that Mr. Michael was at fault, given his past history.

The 'lorry' driver Christopher Winehouse, no relation to Amy, said that the Land Rover just darted over into his lane and hit him on the front fender.

He said that Michael appeared to be completely disoriented, dazed, and he was definitely acting like they say in Osaka, Japan totally frucked up.

The British singer, who has had eleven number one songs in the United Kingdom said that the driver of the fire truck actually hit him.

Officer Nathan Finesilver informed Michael that it was not a fire truck that was involved in the accident.

Michael apologized and said that he meant to say ambulance. The officer started undoing his handcuffs from his service belt.

Michael asked him why he was going to arrest him and not the driver of the motorcycle.

Officer Finesilver gave Michael a drug and alcohol test which he passed. But when the officer asked him to touch his nose, Michael responded by asking "With what?"

By then a pretty good size crowd had gathered and they started chanting Michael! Michael! Michael!.

George asked the officer why they were shouting out Michael Jackson's name. The officer laughed and said that they were not shouting out Michael Jackson's name, that they were shouting out Michael Flatley's name, the man from Riverdance, Lord of The Dance.

Officer Finesilver said that it looked like his 2009 Land Rover had extensive damage and would probably have to be totaled.

Michael looked at the officer with a puzzled look on his face and told him that he was not driving a 2009 Land Rover, that he was driving a 2012 Honda Civic.

The officer pushed Michael against his police car, slapped the handcuffs on him, and proceeded to take him down to the station house.

SIDENOTE: Once George Michael arrived at the police station he was given a much more extensive sobriety test. The results showed that Michael had no traces of drugs, alcohol, or illegal steroids. But he did have a tremendous amount of Twinkies in his system.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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