Written by Patti Beckert
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Topics: Hillary Clinton

Friday, 17 July 2009

image for Clinton Throws Hissy Fit
Hillary Clinton

Hillary Clinton wants the President to know in no uncertain terms that she's just as important a part of his Administration as Joe Biden, and she's not backing down this time. After breaking her elbow and missing out on a couple of high-profile trips abroad, Clinton is feeling the sting of being left behind in this administration.

So, exactly what has gotten Clinton so riled up? According to sources closest to Hill, as she's affectionately known around the Oval Office, she's tired of being left out of everything. So far, the President has gone on two burger runs in the past four weeks and hasn't stopped by her office once to take her order. One of those times, he actually took Joe Biden with him and paid for his lunch, which ticked Clinton off to no end. "He and Joe walked right by my office, stuck their heads in the door, and yelled 'goin' to lunch, be back later,' and just left." She continued to rant, "I'm sure he knows how much I love burgers because it was one of the many gazillion questions he had us answer as part of his ridiculous vetting process before getting this asinine job." She quickly retracted the last part of that statement and assured the American public that being Secretary of State does not really suck that bad.

But she did add, "If Obama wants me to be this country's mascot, don't just give me the costume and the title, give me the respect I deserve, and for God's sake, would it hurt to throw in a burger every once in awhile?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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