(Igloo Trash)Former Alashka Governor Sarah Palin will retire from public life and become a Roman Catholic Nun, according to Sources Close to the dim-witted twit.
"My tenure has Governor has been one long nightmare for the Citizens of the Grate State of Alashka"
proclaimed the self-proclaimed "hockey-mom".
"Drinking home-made liquor and smoking meth is about all the Good People of this state can do to try to blot out the blighted administration of me and my corrupt cronies" she continued.
Ms. Palin admitted she knows nothing about foreign policy, that she's illiterate, that she's taken massive bribes in the form of a $500,000 house, that her 'son' Trig is actually her daughter's, and that she's "just a despicable, rotten excuse for a human being".
"The nuns gonna show me how to do penance and wear sack-cloth and ashes and Beg Jesus to forgive me for being a dreadful sinner who's made Baby Jesus cry" said Dreadful Sarah in a rambling and incoherent statement before a stunned crowd of reporters.
"If you Commie Liberal Media types had been watching this would be no surprise" she added.
The Commie Liberal Media Types were too shocked to reply.