Barack Obama has announced his nominee for the opening in the US Supreme Court left by Justice Stephen Breyer who is leaving the court to run his family's New Hampshire ice cream stand.
Obama had hinted that he was looking for a person of empathy, someone who could feel the pain of others and make decisions with an awareness of how real lives might be effected.
The nation was shocked when the President placed the name of Jesus Christ into nomination. Liberals were first to object based on separation of Church and State. Obama replied that Jesus was rejected by the only religion he ever belonged to.
Christian conservatives raised holy heaven over the nomination citing innumerable citations from the nominee's record:
"Turn the other cheek! Love your enemies? Whatever you do to the least... This Jesus is clearly a bleeding heart who will judge all cases with some limp wrist dedication to mercy and loving kindness. Obama might as well nominate Jimmy Carter!"